这是我翻译的一片文章,对我很重要,请英语好的你帮我修改一下,谢谢

Question

本文摘自高等教育自学考试<<口译与听力>>一书Unit Ten Habitation and Environment(Lesson One)是本人学习翻译的练习课程,请在翻译行业当中有所建树的同志赐教,谢谢!!!

原文:Secretary-General Kofi Annan's message on occasion of World Habitat Day."Cities For All,"to be marked October 1999(联合国秘书长科菲.安南在1999年10月举行的世界人居日"人人共有的城市"上发表的致词).

When the century opened,one in 10 people lived in cities.As we prepare to leave it,more than half of humanmind does.That is more than three billion people.What kind of environment are those three billion living in,on the eve of the new millennium?

当新千年到来的时候,十个人中至少有一个生活在城市里.当我们准备离开的时候,有超过一半的人也在这样做.那可是30多亿人呢!而当我们处在新千年前夕的时候,那30多亿人生活的环境又是怎样的呢?

The appeal of the city has always that it offers opportunity and the chance of a better life.But too often,it does not work out like that.Most of today's cities are sharply divided along class,race or ethnic lines——or even three at once(我不会翻译此句,请指教).Many millions of people live in overcrowded slums and squatter settlement,without access to basic services.And millions of the most vulnerable are women.

一个城市,只所以拥有难以抵挡的魅力,是因为它为美好的生活提供了可能和机会.但是事实往往并非如此.当今大多数城市都被按照阶级,人种或种族进行了硬性划分.有数以百万的人都生活在拥挤的贫民窟和违法的建筑区里,连基本的服务都享受不到.而在他们当中,最为脆弱的就是女性.

These people lead insecure lives,and have little or no say in decisions that shape their lives.But we can help them break free.We can give them security of tenure,they are likely to invest in creating better homes,better neighbourhoods and ultimately,better communities,and that when local government work in genuine partnership with civil socity——including the urban poor——the entire environment thrives.

这些人的生活毫无保障,在制定影响其生活的决策时也没有任何发言权,但是我们可以帮助他们冲破藩篱,获得自由.我们还能给他们可靠的房地产持有权,而他们,也就有可能创造美好的家园,更好的邻里关系,最终会创造一个更好的社会.当当地政府和民间团体以及城中的贫民能像真正的伙伴一样一起工作,整个就会变得生机盎然.

On this last World Habitate Day of twentieth century,let us recommit ourselves to making the Habitate Agenda come true and to ensuring that all people living in cities——young and old,rich and poor,man or woman——have a say in the decisions that affect their lives.Because cities that succeed are indeed "Cities For All",let's start building now.

在这个20世纪最后一个世界人居日上,让我们再次承诺:让人居议程成为现实并且保证所有生活在城市里的居民,不管是年青人还是老年人,穷人或是富人,男人抑或是女人在制定影响其生活的决策当中都有发言权,因为一个城市的成功就是实现"人人共有",让我们现在就开始着手建设吧!

Answer 1

原文:Secretary-General Kofi Annan's message on occasion of World Habitat Day."Cities For All,"to be marked October 1999(联合国秘书长科菲.安南在1999年10月举行的世界人居日"人人共有的城市"
[纪念活动/仪式]
上发表的致词).

When the century opened,one in 10 people lived in cities.As we prepare to leave it,more than half of humanmind does.That is more than three billion people.What kind of environment are those three billion living in,on the eve of the new millennium?

当新千年[错，应该是本世纪] 到来[开始] 的时候,[全球每] 十个人中至少有一个生活在城市里.当我们准备离开的时候[错，当我们与本世纪告别的时候],有超过一半的人[住在城市里] 也在这样做.那可是30多亿人呢!而当我们处在新千年前夕的时候,那30多亿人生活的环境又是怎样的呢?

The appeal of the city has always that it offers opportunity and the chance of a better life.But too often,it does not work out like that.Most of today's cities are sharply divided along class,race or ethnic lines——or even three at once(我不会翻译此句,请指教).Many millions of people live in overcrowded slums and squatter settlement,without access to basic services.And millions of the most vulnerable are women.

一个城市,只所以拥有难以抵挡的魅力,是因为它为美好的生活提供了可能和机会.但是事实往往并非如此.当今大多数城市都[存在着。。。的鸿沟/巨大差异，有时三种差异/鸿沟同时存在]被按照阶级,人种或种族进行了硬性划分.有数以百万的人都生活在拥挤的贫民窟和违法的建筑区里,连基本的[市政] 服务都享受不到.而在他们当中,最为脆弱的就是女性.

These people lead insecure lives,and have little or no say in decisions that shape their lives.But we can help them break free.We can give them security of tenure,they are likely to invest in creating better homes,better neighbourhoods and ultimately,better communities,and that when local government work in genuine partnership with civil socity——including the urban poor——the entire environment thrives.

这些人的生活毫无保障,在制定影响其生活的决策[过程中] 时也没有任何发言权,但是我们可以帮助他们冲破藩篱,获得自由.我们还能给他们可靠的房地产持有权[居住权] ,而他们,也就有可能[努力去] 创造美好的家园,更好的[社区] 邻里关系,最终会创造一个更好的社会.当当地[地方] 政府和民间团体[包括城市贫民在内的公民社会团体] 以及城中的贫民能像真正[携手努力]的伙伴一样一起工作,整个[城市环境] 就会变得生机盎然.

On this last World Habitate Day of twentieth century,let us recommit ourselves to making the Habitate Agenda come true and to ensuring that all people living in cities——young and old,rich and poor,man or woman——have a say in the decisions that affect their lives.Because cities that succeed are indeed "Cities For All",let's start building now.

在这个20世纪最后一个“世界人居日”[要加双引号] 上,让我们再次承诺:让人居议程成为现实并且保证所有生活在城市里的居民,不管是年青人还是老年人,穷人或是富人,男人抑或是女人，在制定影响其生活的决策当中都有发言权,因为一个城市的成功就是实现"人人共有",让我们现在就开始着手建设吧!

修改都在方框里，有些地方需要删掉的，相信你自己可以发现并且理顺吧。
评价：
总体上翻的还行，可惜一些关键地方理解错误或漏译，还要更加细心才行啊。

Answer 2

联合国秘书长科菲·安南的讯息:世界上的城市人居日。”,“要1999年12月 当这个世纪打开,有10%的人生活在城市当我们准备离开,超过一半的humanmind做…那是超过3亿人. 什么样的环境是那些生活在3亿的前夜,新千年吗? 这座城市的魅力,它提供的机会和良好的生活条件但是经常,它并不算出像今天大多数的城市却沿着阶级、种族或人种的线路——甚至是三(我不会翻译此句,请指教立刻)举办数以百万计的人居住在拥挤贫民窟和者的和解,但基本服务数以百万计的最脆弱的是女性。 这些人带领安全感的生活,并有很少或没有说在决定他们生活形态…但我们可以帮助他们挣脱我们可以给他们的,他们很可能会投资在创造美好家园,更好的社区,最终,更好的社区,当当地政府在真正的合作伙伴,包括民用大城镇贫困——整个环境会繁荣昌盛。 在这个世界上的最后一天,二十世纪生境,让我们再次承诺我们将使生境议程成真,以确保所有的人居住在城市——年轻人和老年人,富人和穷人,男人或女人——有一个说在影响他们生活的决策因为城市,成功的确是“城市”,让我们开始建设。

Answer 3

写得很不错不用改!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

This excerpt from higher education self-study exam to < > > with hearing his interpretation of Habitation and Unit operations (One) is like I learn Lesson of translation practice course, please in translation industry observer of the comrades, thank you!!!!!!!

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